Sincerity.

Malik and I have a different approach to music. Although a musician, he is very much from a business perspective. First and foremost, he would like is ventures to be profitable. By now you must know me. Although it would be nice to make a living from music, I don't like to make compromises. Not to be all cliche "I'll die for my art . . .blah, blah, blah" but in actuality it is very close to the truth. It is a part of me. Indivisible from me. It is me. I cannot be dishonest. There is just no room for insincerity when the narrator has a story.

I'll do all I can to market what I do as I do it, I have no interest in cashing in on fads. I believe if you believe in your product with your everything, others will believe in it too. In fact, that is how I've convinced every creative collaborator on any project up to this point, including Malik. No one knows what they are getting into when I have an idea. Sometimes I don't exactly know either.

Sometimes it surprises me because I think I ask for a lot from my co-conspirators. Complete trust and a healthy dose of blind faith. But no one has said "no" yet. And I would never lead anyone astray.

Whenever something happens in pop culture or the world at large I often wonder what Bill Hicks or Howard Zinn would say (the latter more for current events.) As for music, it can be one of two things-- completely sincere or completely insincere and manufactured. There really is no in between. You can't cash in on a craze and honestly say you are giving it your heart. Your intentions wouldn't be sincere.

I think Malik and I will be a good partnership. He'll remind me that I need to find some way to survive by what I do and I'll remind him that he is not just a business man. Before we sat down yesterday and had a talk, he was really focused on creating a phenomenon based on what was already popular. Likewise, I was floating with minimal direction besides a loose "marketing" plan based on documenting EVERYTHING. I convinced him that being true to your soul can be profitable and he convinced me that we don't have the time or assets to create art that doesn't at least pay for itself. Basically, we balance each other out.

His deadline to get his project up and running is May. My goal is to have all the pieces for my project recorded by the time I turn 28 (8/15.) Although I do not put a lot of stock in astrology, my Saturn return has started. By 30 I would like my life to change for the better artistically.

Before this, I was terrible slump musically. It probably lasted for about three years. I had no focus or direction. I wrote poetry/pros(e), circuit bent toys and performed harsh noise shows; but that was about all I did. Then about February or March I figured out what I needed to do. And it has been clear ever since. What it comes down to is trust. Primarily trusting others-- and trusting myself to do what is best for every one.

I leave you with this:



Play with your fucking heart, indeed.

(Little did I realize at the early 2am-ish I posted this Bill Hicks video--amongst others--on Malik's facebook, it was Hicks' birthday. He would have been 48.)

Sincerity.